Posted on Monday, April 4, 2005
Seen at the checkout counter this evening while I was doing my grocery shopping (like I was supposed to be doing on Sunday):
Should Jessica Leave Him??? It's Getting NASTY!!! Oh, the drama!
When I saw this, I had a great idea for a new magazine: It's None of Your Damn Business Weekly. Each week it would focus on all the exciting stories like this one that are, frankly, none of your damn business.
Should Jessica Simpson divorce her husband? It's None Of Your Damn Business™!
Is Britney Spears pregnant? It's None Of Your Damn Business™!
Why do people buy these things? It's None Of Your Damn Business™!
Subscribe today and get a free tote bag with "What's in this bag? It's None of Your Damn Business™!" on it. Operators are standing by...
Except where otherwise noted, all content on this site is provided under the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike license.
If you think anything I write here represents the opinions of anybody but myself, you need more help than I can give you. The opinions are all mine, folks. Nobody else's.
If that's too hard to understand... well, I'm sorry. There's only so much I can do. I'm not a therapist, and I'm not a miracle worker. I wish I could help you work through your delusional belief that I'm speaking for anyone else but myself. Honestly, I do. But in the end, that's a monkey you'll have to get off your back on your own. Sorry.
Web feed
I was thinking more like "Out of Touch" Magazine.
"You'll never guess who's president!"
"Which countries are we at war with? Find out inside!"
"Hot New Dance--The Macarena!"
"Previewing the Hot New Features in Windows '97!"
"Could Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck Make a Good Couple?"
and of course
"Which One's Pink?"