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Fun With Spam: OK, You’ve Got My Attention Edition

Category: Fun With Spam

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Another actual spam found while I was cleaning out my (Hotmail) spam filter:

I've never seen a message that was just a long block of seemingly random text before. But it was the first sentence that made me laugh:

It was pretty ineffectual when it came to watch me dance (3.5M) again tonight in the eyes as her breasts came in contact with my stated greater goals.

"As her breasts came in contact with my stated greater goals". Indeed! An infrequent enough occurrence, but definitely worth e-mailing strangers about when it happens...

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If you think anything I write here represents the opinions of anybody but myself, you need more help than I can give you. The opinions are all mine, folks. Nobody else's.

If that's too hard to understand... well, I'm sorry. There's only so much I can do. I'm not a therapist, and I'm not a miracle worker. I wish I could help you work through your delusional belief that I'm speaking for anyone else but myself. Honestly, I do. But in the end, that's a monkey you'll have to get off your back on your own. Sorry.