Category: Moblog: Because I Own a Cameraphone, Dammit
Monday, May 2, 2005
Here's one great way:

Yeah, you just wrap those cheeks right around that pole, there, buddy. It's not like anyone else might want to use it too.
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If you think anything I write here represents the opinions of anybody but myself, you need more help than I can give you. The opinions are all mine, folks. Nobody else's.
If that's too hard to understand... well, I'm sorry. There's only so much I can do. I'm not a therapist, and I'm not a miracle worker. I wish I could help you work through your delusional belief that I'm speaking for anyone else but myself. Honestly, I do. But in the end, that's a monkey you'll have to get off your back on your own. Sorry.
"Sometimes you just get an itch in those hard to reach spots..."