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Questions That You Will Never Find Out the Answers To

Monday, November 19, 2007

So I'm in a hurry for lunch today and I duck into one of those typical downtown chain joints to get something to eat.

I pick up a pre-made chicken Caesar salad in a plastic container. While I'm waiting to pay, I look more closely at the container and notice a sticker on it that reads:

"NOW made with 100% Natural Chicken!"

I realize that they put that sticker there to make me think "mmm, high quality ingredients". But instead it makes me think "It's news that the chicken is actually chicken? What were they making them with before?"

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If you think anything I write here represents the opinions of anybody but myself, you need more help than I can give you. The opinions are all mine, folks. Nobody else's.

If that's too hard to understand... well, I'm sorry. There's only so much I can do. I'm not a therapist, and I'm not a miracle worker. I wish I could help you work through your delusional belief that I'm speaking for anyone else but myself. Honestly, I do. But in the end, that's a monkey you'll have to get off your back on your own. Sorry.